Wednesday morning I visited the local hospital for a routine follow-up. Yes, my routine follow-up was at the hospital. That's because it was a follow-up to confirm that the Essure procedure I had done in July worked.
For those of you, who don't or won't click on the link above, the Essure procedure has ended my ability to get pregnant. Yup, the inn is closed, the hotel is out of business, no more babies are living in this body.
So I went to the hospital, met my midwives there (gosh I love those gals!) and got set up for the test. The radiologist who performed the follow-up, came in, took a lot at the x-ray screen, and said, "Success!".
But as I drove home, it made me start to think. Yes, hubby and I talked about this procedure, and planned it, and it was not a surprise. We've planned for years to have 3 children and no more. I'm very content and happy with our family just the way it is. And I'm thrilled not to have to think about birth control or worry about accidental pregnancies.
But it was definitely interesting to hear the radiologist say "Success!". I've successfully ended my abilbity to get pregnant and bear children. And yet, I still know SO many people who would give anything to have the success of getting pregnant. I could wish that me taking my name out of the proverbial hat would increase their chances....but sadly, I don't think that really has any impact at all!
Oh well, I could still be a surrogate.....and maybe I will one day!
Showing posts with label babies. Show all posts
Showing posts with label babies. Show all posts
Saturday, November 7, 2009
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
Sad
Look up sad on thesaurus.com and here's what you get:
bereaved, bitter, blue*, cheerless, dejected, despairing, despondent, disconsolate, dismal, distressed, doleful, down, down in dumps, down in mouth, downcast, forlorn, gloomy, glum, grief-stricken, grieved, heartbroken, heartsick, heavyhearted, hurting, in doldrums, in grief, in the dumps, languishing, low, low-spirited, lugubrious, melancholy, morbid, morose, mournful, out of sorts, pensive, pessimistic, sick at heart, somber, sorrowful, sorry, troubled, weeping, wistful, woebegone
That pretty much covers it.
Max and Maria have been taken after only 19 weeks with their mother. Their fragile hearts and bodies could not make it to join us in this world.
Some of you may say, "they are in a better place now". But really, what would be so wrong with them being here and living a full and happy life with the two wonderful parents they would have had in Linda and Ron. I think that would be a damn wonderful place for them to be.
Some of you may say, "everything happens for a reason". Really??? What on earth could be the reason? Two people who have wished and hoped and prayed for a child for so long. What reason could there be to put them through this.
As another friend put it, " It’s times like these when I have trouble believing in a God." Seriously....
I have spent SO much of today holding my three babies close, and thinking of the one I lost. Holding my kids and hugging and loving them and telling them I love them. To the point, that Trevor asked me if he was in trouble, or if I was leaving on a trip!
Today my heart is so heavy for the loss, the unexplainable tragic loss that has happenend to one one my dearest friends and one of the kindest people I know. So kind, she hates spiders but WILL NOT kill them.....she'll do whatever it takes (including almost dying) to save them and let them live, just not in her shower!
Oh how I wish I could do something....more than just "being a friend", even though I know that has quite a bit of value. I just hate feeling so helpless.
Max & Maria, you are loved, sweet babies. I miss you, even though I never knew you. Linda & Ron, know that you are loved by SO many, and that we all want to help any way we can.
bereaved, bitter, blue*, cheerless, dejected, despairing, despondent, disconsolate, dismal, distressed, doleful, down, down in dumps, down in mouth, downcast, forlorn, gloomy, glum, grief-stricken, grieved, heartbroken, heartsick, heavyhearted, hurting, in doldrums, in grief, in the dumps, languishing, low, low-spirited, lugubrious, melancholy, morbid, morose, mournful, out of sorts, pensive, pessimistic, sick at heart, somber, sorrowful, sorry, troubled, weeping, wistful, woebegone
That pretty much covers it.
Max and Maria have been taken after only 19 weeks with their mother. Their fragile hearts and bodies could not make it to join us in this world.
Some of you may say, "they are in a better place now". But really, what would be so wrong with them being here and living a full and happy life with the two wonderful parents they would have had in Linda and Ron. I think that would be a damn wonderful place for them to be.
Some of you may say, "everything happens for a reason". Really??? What on earth could be the reason? Two people who have wished and hoped and prayed for a child for so long. What reason could there be to put them through this.
As another friend put it, " It’s times like these when I have trouble believing in a God." Seriously....
I have spent SO much of today holding my three babies close, and thinking of the one I lost. Holding my kids and hugging and loving them and telling them I love them. To the point, that Trevor asked me if he was in trouble, or if I was leaving on a trip!
Today my heart is so heavy for the loss, the unexplainable tragic loss that has happenend to one one my dearest friends and one of the kindest people I know. So kind, she hates spiders but WILL NOT kill them.....she'll do whatever it takes (including almost dying) to save them and let them live, just not in her shower!
Oh how I wish I could do something....more than just "being a friend", even though I know that has quite a bit of value. I just hate feeling so helpless.
Max & Maria, you are loved, sweet babies. I miss you, even though I never knew you. Linda & Ron, know that you are loved by SO many, and that we all want to help any way we can.
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